tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8693522349341599439.post2292159089200693292..comments2024-03-20T07:10:24.889-07:00Comments on Don't Quit Your Day Job: The Opportunity of a LifetimeM.H. Van Keurenhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07736878298979709150noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8693522349341599439.post-54617703312160432432013-06-05T19:46:12.190-07:002013-06-05T19:46:12.190-07:00Jerad, Thanks for your comments. Some good thought...Jerad, Thanks for your comments. Some good thoughts here. It's hard to boil down the complex concepts to just a word or two and not leave some potential for confusion. Stay tuned for another version...M.H. Van Keurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07736878298979709150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8693522349341599439.post-79396743631781000422013-05-27T20:29:40.305-07:002013-05-27T20:29:40.305-07:00Hey dude, just finished Rhubarb and I'm excite...Hey dude, just finished Rhubarb and I'm excited to check out your next book. This pre-review thing you got going is pretty cool. So for my critique: Sounds interesting, but I can't say I'm hooked. The opening paragraph needs more background on this place in time. Is there a situation or culture that has evolved that is the reason for the stark living situations between these two characters? Or it is just the "lottery of birth"? I'd like to know what kind if past/society these character are up against. Second paragraph: Are the NAIs rare? Long lost artifacts? Like how powerful compared to future tech? Just needs another adjective in there. Third paragraph: for the fist half, I get you're painting a picture of all the cool places they're traveling to, but maybe it's going too far into detail, too much summary. I think you could afford to cut the first half entirely. Keep everything as-is after "But when their NAIs..." This really sets up the story and makes me want to read. JeradJeradhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/06691346794376888220noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8693522349341599439.post-23271162159574288862013-05-21T11:00:30.872-07:002013-05-21T11:00:30.872-07:00Having just finished reading Rhubarb, I have every...Having just finished reading Rhubarb, I have every intention of reading your next book. Truthfully, I rarely read the blurbs or reviews before reading a book, because I don't want my own opinions to be influenced. I usually read reviews after I have written one myself if I feel the material was good (or bad) enough to warrant one. Then I just see if any one agrees with me or if I seem to be really off base.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8693522349341599439.post-4025833074670883662013-05-09T13:46:10.608-07:002013-05-09T13:46:10.608-07:00Aleryan, thanks for your feedback. This is why I p...Aleryan, thanks for your feedback. This is why I put this on here. I've gotten a lot of comments, so the final product is likely to be very different. Writing these blurbs is a difficult task, especially when you're so close to the material. It's easy to let ideas sail through without thinking of how a new reader will perceive them.<br />You're right, the book is more serious than Rhubarb, but its a story I've been thinking about for a long time. Thanks again.M.H. Van Keurenhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07736878298979709150noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8693522349341599439.post-57857395305335030822013-05-07T21:31:38.144-07:002013-05-07T21:31:38.144-07:00From reading your "back cover blurb" I g...From reading your "back cover blurb" I get the feeling it's a little more serious than Rhubarb. After my husband explained what a "sentient supercomputer" is, I decided the story sounds interesting and I would pick it up to read the first page or two. Being a fan of Rhubarb already would give a little more weight to the idea of buying this book. The formation of one sentence in your blurb bothers me. It's "Rob’s lives in a server room, but Teague’s trots by his side as a smart-mouthed robotic ring-tailed lemur." Maybe, "While the NAI under Rob's command is housed in a server room, Teague's is found trotting by his side as a smart-mouthed robotic ring-tailed lemur." Or something. The other sentence just doesn't seem complete to me, but hey, it's your book. :)Aleryanhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17781981586737576108noreply@blogger.com